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Skype you later, alligator!

Dear Editor,

An apple was for eating and to twitter or tweet was only for the birds.  To download would be to put the shopping away, kindling was for lighting fires. was WW3 against communism, and iPods, pads or phones or MP3s are new to me.

Internet, what Interpol used to catch spies in. A website must be a spider’s home, and a laptop was for an exotic dancer to perform on.

Wikileaks is “new speak” for incontinence, and newspaper hacks are journalists.

Babies gurgled, now they also google. PC plod is a silly blogger. See your Facebook in a mirror and mind your cat leaves the mouse alone.

To find my house, I’ll go by SatNav. My boat will be found by GPS.  Switch me off, I’ve had enough of all these new gismos and gadgets.

I want to live in peace in the old fashioned way.

So Skype you later, alligator!

Thanks for all the fascinating data!

John Oxenham, By post