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Dirty northerners

ACCORDING TO a study carried out by the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, the further north people live, the less likely they are to wash their hands after going to the toilet.

The study revealed that people living in the north of England were three times more likely to be contaminated with toilet bugs.

The most likely explanation is that fewer northerners are washing their hands with soap after answering the call of nature, say researchers.

Dr Val Curtis, who led the study, said: “We were flabbergasted by the finding that so many people had faecal bugs on their hands.”

“The figures were far higher than we had anticipated, and suggest that there is a real problem with people washing their hands in the UK.”